
Somehow I Found Myself in the VIP Section of Jason Kelce's Charity Event
Wednesday was Jason Kelce’s event in Sea Isle and it was easily the craziest one since they began this event. I’ve never seen the OD and Paddy’s Green packed as much as it was. Like ten deep to get to the bar. We had current Eagles players, former Eagles players, Super Bowl Champs, NFL Insiders, security guards, the works. It was awesome. Some dude bought a pair of Nike’s for $2,000. I heard people were paying $1,000 to play Jason Kelce in flip cup. I wouldn’t be surprised if they raised a billion dollars for the Eagles Autism Foundation.
Let’s recap it.
“We came here to drink. We came here to celebrate. We came here because the Birds are the Birds.” Couldn’t have said it better myself:
“We came here to drink. We came here to celebrate. We came here because the Birds are the Birds.” pic.twitter.com/sKkRQC61XU
— Kyle Pagan (@CBKylePagan) June 27, 2024
Your boy somehow finagled his way into getting a media credential for the event. Shoutout to the Eagles. So we get down there and have 15 minutes with Jason squeezed in after the VIP Meet & Greet and before the event starts. NBC10 hosted it so they get a couple questions and then Howard Eskin asked three. THREE QUESTIONS. That’s why he’s the king. By the time he was done we only had a couple minutes left and that’s where I pounced. I hit Kelce with a classic guy’s guy question. Let him know that I’m non-threatening and one of the fellas. Enough talking about football in the middle of June and Taylor Swift. Lets talk about beers:
Jason Kelce’s top 5 places to have a beer pic.twitter.com/nlCH9vDsdF
— Kyle Pagan (@CBKylePagan) June 27, 2024
That was such a himbo answer. Not gonna lie he missed patio beer and shower beer. Also brunch beer is a clear top-5. Honestly, I think I caught him off guard. He was probably still out of breath from having to answer Eskin’s three questions before hand. Btw Kelce looks GOOD! He’s probably down to edge rusher weight right now. Getting that body tight for the Monday Night Football gauntlet.
So media ends and I just started walking around the Pour House. I’m pretty sure I wasn’t supposed to be in there after media availability was over, but sometimes when you bumble around like an idiot people just don’t bother you. It didn’t hurt it was packed to the gills with 20+ football players, VIP ticket-holders, people working the event, and more. Sweaty dude musk was running wild. If you’re unfamiliar with the Pour House it’s small and on a regular dinner night there is nowhere to move. I’m pretty sure I hit Fletcher Cox’s girlfriend with my backpack. Thank god he didn’t kill me. After apologizing I turn around and almost run directly into Taylor Swift’s friend Kylie Kelce. Almost body-checked her and I probably would’ve gotten the worst of it. What a start to the day for your boy. Thank god I spotted Big Dom and Todd Herremans over in the corner and just shot the shit with them.
So I get talking with Big Dom and the Toddfather and after a little bit notice I’m the only “media” left in there. It’s just me with a bunch of Super Bowl Champs, VIPs, and current Eagles hanging out. What a world. And I got an awesome behind the scenes look at how everything operated. I gotta tell you Kylie Kelce rules. Right before the event starts she gave the crispiest finger whistle only a coach could. Then she doled out orders like a general leading her troops into battle. She had gargantuan men hanging on her every word. She advised everyone not to take shots because they wouldn’t make it to 8pm which was followed by some groans. A former Super Bowl champ even boo’d and without a beat she shouted back, “Shut up, (redacted).” It was amazing stuff. I’d die on my shield for Kylie Kelce.
After that it was a free for all. We only had an hour to get all the content we could. And here we go…
Brandon Graham guarantees five sacks in Year 15. Heard it here first:
Brandon Graham guarantees 5 sacks this season*
*this is a guarantee even though he didn't say guarantee pic.twitter.com/16ekgciizQ
— Kyle Pagan (@CBKylePagan) June 27, 2024
Todd Herremans could still suit up:
.@toddherremans could still suit up pic.twitter.com/BKCMZ8IbRc
— Kyle Pagan (@CBKylePagan) June 27, 2024
I met a NFL Insider:
Even NFL Insiders take days off @MikeGarafolo pic.twitter.com/0x5ohGvG1m
— Kyle Pagan (@CBKylePagan) June 27, 2024
Airports is already on Matvei Michkov watch:
That "I'll let you know." from Johnny Airports was so smoooooth @JClarkNBCS pic.twitter.com/z1f7AhsnrL
— Kyle Pagan (@CBKylePagan) June 26, 2024
I love the one guy in the navy blue trying to get Airports’ attention the entire time. Sorry bro. We’re talking tarmac right now. Everything else leaves Airports’ brain when you’re talking tarmac.
This guy gave me my favorite Cowboys prediction so far this year:
“Give me a Dallas prediction”
“Dallas blows” pic.twitter.com/K7OGGbQqQJ
— Kyle Pagan (@CBKylePagan) June 27, 2024
This guy made a Dallas Sucks song ft. Jason Kelce:
Dallas Sucks for a good cause pic.twitter.com/DHyAR36BQl
— Kyle Pagan (@CBKylePagan) June 27, 2024
Fin:
Bye Sea Isle pic.twitter.com/ia4CShY9dB
— Kyle Pagan (@CBKylePagan) June 27, 2024
It was an awesome event for an awesome cause. Eagles fans showed why they’re the best fans in the world.
The only thing I’ll say is I don’t know how they can continue it in it’s exact form. I think the Kelce’s are too famous to continue the same venue. I mean Jason had his own personal bodyguard attached to his hip the entire time and it wasn’t Big Dom. Travis probably wasn’t allowed to show up because Sea Isle doesn’t have enough police to deal with the Swifties. Both places they used were absolutely mobbed and lines were around the corner to get in. The point of the event of course is for charity and they do an amazing job. But they might be better off doing something bigger and better somewhere down the shore that would be less of a headache logistically.